This cozy place

Eindeutig einer meiner Lieblingstexte (von mir):

Awakened from your rough pallet you feel the red strings the steel latt floor left in the skin of your back. The manufactured mass produced beds are comfortable to those, who fit the average height, fit the average build, fit the average liking for the average, but for anybody who is not that average, it´s a nightmare without sleep. Deep sleep. Something unknown for so long, you can´t even remember when it has really felt like thinking for the last time. Really thinking freely. In the twilight the world becomes if not given the opportunity of a good nap every twelve hours all your senses are reduced. All your mind is reduced. Caught in a routine you´re not even aware of while you´re following the paths they told you to. You aim for the button of the TV and after hitting the thick air two times, you hear the buzzing sound of electricity doing its work as they told it to.

Everybody is part of the state.

Sure, why not? The TV talks to me. It says it´s happy that I am here, that I listen, that I am safe and alive. Here, in my room, it´s impossible to hurt someone, it´s impossible to start a riot. We´re all safe inside our homes. And outside, there´s the state to look after you.

You are saved.

Oh, I am? That´s nice, right? I am too tired to disagree with everything I can barely read in the papers, the bills and everywhere I go. Everything around me is there to make me calm and docile. They decided that this is better than the riots. As if anybody alive could remember them. The riots. The crash. The big cave-in in the cavern of the order. They say, it all hung in the balance. Anarchy or new world order, you had the choice. Only that nobody asked you. You chose, but nobody was interested in your decision. The decision had already been made.

We´re all welcome in the new order.

Sounds good. Sounds like home. Like you can come and go, as you like. I want to leave now, is that okay? But we have just started, stay a little while longer. They always get me with this. I´m always convinced by their one-line arguments. We´ve done so much for you, why should you go. Don´t know. Just an idea stepping out of a sleepless brain. You exit the door and the first thing you notice is that color, the placards in that color, the banners, the flags everywhere, shining in the sun, sending electromagnetic waves to your brain in the frequency of exactly that color. Their color. It´s everywhere and it says to you:

The individual is small. The state protects everybody. Everybody is responsible.

Break a law and you´re responsible for the punishment. Break half a law and you´re responsible if the states smashes your head in. Metaphorically speaking of course. They have much cleaner methods, to make the streets safe. To secure them for the rest of the people. It´s always a simple equation. Security plus freedom equals constant. Give a little freedom away to get a little security. Give more freedom away to get more security. In dangerous times, you need to give more freedom away than in peaceful ones. Our time is secure. There is no such thing as crime anymore and if there is, there´s nobody left to tell. There are no prisons. You don´t need to guard the new prisoners, because they can´t move on their own anymore, they can´t talk. They are not able to hurt you anymore, they are not able to violate you anymore, they cannot steal anymore, they can´t offend you anymore.

The greater good justifies the means.

A lot of people have disappeared. Who knows who reported them, but he just did his job, his duty to the state that safes him from crime. The color of the poster on every wall stays printed on my retina even when I close my eyes. The blessed guard, the state, never leaves my side. Protects me, wherever I go. He never turns his back on me, as long as I am nice and docile. As long as I follow his path, beaten by so many pairs of feet before me, one tiny human life would not be enough to count them all. I have hardly left the house and I already feel like sleeping again. Sleeping in a warm and cozy and rest-spending bed. I´m protected by that. I´m secured from the danger of thinking. I need a place to sleep. Just the root of an idea in the mush of my brain. Only one way possible. The colors are following me through the streets.

Officer, I committed a crime, I admit it. I can´t live with the guilt anymore. Please take me with you.

The greater good justifies.

Maybe my last resting place won´t be that cozy after all.